fractions of a life.

Ahh. Work, work, work. And drama, drama, drama. Both seem to follow me wherever I go. The last two days of work have been particularly hectic and crazy and obnoxious, what with busy season coming up and a family reunion at the resort and the housekeepers not knowing what they're doing so that I spent half my days cleaning up after them. How's that for a paradox? The office worker spends half her work time cleaning up after the cleaners....oh well. It could be worse, I suppose. There is less tension in the office this year, it seems, and more people to vent with/to, so that's a bonus.

As crummy as today was, however, my drive home more than made up for it. The sun was only just starting to go down when I left today and my drive home was so beautiful. I kicked off my shoes and took down my hair and drove home with all the windows down and the music gloriously loud. And as soon as I hit county road 1, everything always becomes so much better and I am reminded that even if there are small petty parts of my life that I don't like, I'm so lucky and blessed to be part of this extraordinary life, as ordinary as it often seems and feels. When I'm driving past a lake, with the road winding out in front of me, twisting over hills that seem to beckon to my right foot to hit that gas pedal just a little harder, and I'm smelling freshly cut grass and the sun is shining in my face, it's hard for me to be too sad or angry about anything. And those feelings of anger and sadness always return, of course, but it helps immensely that they're tempered now with images of lake and forest and sun in front of me with the wind at my back, pushing me home.

I think I've told a lot of people this, but I never cease to be amazed at how many different shades of green there are. There's this overlook on my road to/from work, called "Stark's Vista" and it's the most gorgeous overlook of trees I think I've ever, ever seen. It makes all of the day's frustration and irritants and anger vaporize before me like the mist coming up from the road on a warm day after it's rained. It's a wonderful thing.

I think growing up in the Lakes area makes it hard for me to appreciate the beauty of the area. People come all the way from like California and Massachussetts to vacation at our resort and I'm just like, "Why? I don't get it. It's a lake, people. It's a forest..." etc. I am only just learning to appreciate my surroundings.

But as lucky as I am in my beautiful drives, I crave human company as well, so I'm having people over tomorrow and it seems like it'll actually be a fairly good gathering. So if you're in the area and know where I live, be there. We're watching kid's movies all night and it's going to be super. It's sounding like there might be a fairly decent turnout, too, which is definitely good because as much as I love one-on-one events, sometimes I just need to be surrounded by people, even if I know I'll feel swallowed up by them at some point.

And Tuesday night. Oh, man, am I excited for Tuesday. I work until 11 p.m. but Brainerd's being cool enough to have a midnight showing of "Batman Begins," which I am ridiculously excited to see. So I'm totally going. So are Krystle and Adam; I'm totally thrilled. It may sound lame, but hey, that's me. I'm cool with that.

I finally got to go to church this morning! I was so glad. I felt so much at peace and it was so nice to have people asking me how I am. I adore my congregation. It is filled with some of the most generous, wonderful, interesting people I've ever met. I'm lucky to know them. And I love the design of our church. I'm sure the new one we're building is cool and all, but I'm really going to miss this building. It has a life, a story of its own, and when I'm sitting in church in the morning and the sun comes through the stained glass windows at the front and the warmth spreads across my face, I feel more at peace with myself than almost anywhere else.

I need a digital camera. All my pictures on myspace have been on here forever now, but I have no new sources. I'll have to work on that. I hope everyone's summer is treating them well. And for those of you I haven't been corresponding with very well lately (and you know who you are), I miss you so call/write/email me and kick me into communicating.

And that's a wrap. At least for tonight. I have tomorrow off so I am going to bed so that I can get up early and pack in as much "off" time as I possibly can.